


we'll be lucky if we ever see the sun

by Impala_Chick



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Cigarettes, Getting Together, Gnomes, Light Angst, M/M, Shane talking to inanimate objects, Smoking, the day after
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-21
Updated: 2020-03-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:47:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23238685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Impala_Chick/pseuds/Impala_Chick
Summary: But today, after everything that happened the night before, Shane’s having a hard time acting normal around Ryan.
Relationships: Ryan Bergara/Shane Madej
Comments: 26
Kudos: 187
Collections: Froday Flash Fiction Little & Monthly Specials 2020





	we'll be lucky if we ever see the sun

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the fffc comm's March bingo prompt _gnomes_. Inspired by [Watcher Weekly #11](https://youtu.be/2HCr9G79oAU?t=1213). How did Ryan know Shane had smoked before? I couldn't let it go...
> 
> Title from the Mikky Eko song _smile._

Shane steps out onto the front porch of the house they’re filming at and takes a deep breath. He just needs a few minutes alone.

It’s funny because Ryan is usually the one who needs to take a break during a shoot. More often than not, Ryan gets himself all worked up and can’t sit still. Shane will be the one to put a hand on his shoulder and say, _Hey, buddy. Maybe you need a break?_ Because that’s in Shane’s unofficial job description. He’s supposed to be the caring and stoic friend. The one who keeps calm and cracks jokes even when Ryan is experiencing abject terror.

But today, after everything that happened the night before, Shane’s having a hard time acting normal around Ryan.

He reaches inside his jacket pocket to pull out the carton of Marlboro Lights. He smacks the bottom of the pack against his palm and debates whether he should actually light one up.

He sighs heavily and puts a cigarette between his lips. He already made his decision when he walked outside, and he’s not going to be able to talk himself out of it now. He returns the pack to his packet and tries not to be too hard on himself. After all, it’s been a few years since he last lit up a cigarette. 

He flicks on the lighter and cups his hand around the flame to protect it from the breeze. The end of the cigarette glows red from the flame, and he inhales deeply. The smoke fills his lungs and calms him, even though the weight of the cigarette on his lips reminds him of last night.

Ryan had _kissed_ him. And then Shane had kissed back. Enthusiastically. With tongue. There was a lot of kissing, is the point. On that shitty couch inside that shitty broken down old house, Ryan felt up Shane like they were on a _date_.

That’s not even the strangest part. The strangest part is that last night, in the dark, after all the cameras were turned off, it felt _nice_. It was like that type of physical intimacy was just an extension of their existing relationship, a natural escalation of all of their back and forth. Shane barely even processed anything last night except Ryan’s plush lips and his dexterous tongue and his wandering hands. Shane had enjoyed it. 

The harsh light of day brought with it a bunch of exigencies Shane had not previously considered. 

Chief among them is what did it _mean_? Is he some sexual experiment for Ryan? Did the spirit box just make Ryan real horny? 

He hears noise from somewhere behind him, and he shuffles down the two front steps. He moves to the right, onto the lawn, so that no one can see him if they are looking out of the doorway. 

No one ever accuses Shane of being brave, after all. That’s Ryan’s thing. 

Shane takes another deep drag and then pulls the cigarette from his lips. He scuffs his shoes against the grass, and notices a plastic garden gnome sitting at the edge of the lawn. It’s staring right at him. It has painted-on brown trousers, a button-up green shirt, and a red pointy hat. But it’s facial expression is one of surprise, its eyes wide with both eyebrows raised. Even though it’s an inanimate object, Shane is feeling serious negative vibes radiating from it. 

He crosses his arms and taps the cigarette, watching the ashes fall to the ground. On the one hand, he knows he could probably just go talk to Ryan. But on the other hand, the whole crew is in the house and they’ve got an episode to finish filming.

“Fuck you,” Shane mumbles as he glares at the judgey gnome. “It’s not as simple as you think.”

Shane is sort of grateful he’s got something to direct his anger at. He can get back into the groove of shouting rude things at nothing but empty air. Maybe that’ll help him salvage what’s left of the episode, considering he’s been pretty quiet all morning.

He puts the cigarette between his lips and breathes in again. On the exhale, smoke billows out in front of him and he focuses on the way it swirls out into the breeze. 

“I’m not exactly the kind of guy Ryan would go for. I mean, mainly because I’m a _guy,_ ” Shane says as he gestures down at himself. 

The gnome looks up at him but doesn’t answer.

“And another thing. We’ve been friends for a seriously long time. He just decides to go for it _now_? In this shitty old house? No romantic ambiance whatsoever.” Shane knows he’s rambling now, but he’s on a roll. 

Shane crouches down to look his new friend in the eye and holds the cigarette in the v of his fingers.

“And then he elbows me in there. Like we’re all good. I mean, what’s up with that?” 

Shane doesn’t realize someone is behind him until the words are already out of his mouth. He gives one final glare at the gnome before straightening up. 

“Are you talking to a garden gnome?” Ryan asks, because of course it has to be Ryan.

Shane sighs the kind of sigh that travels through his whole body and makes his shoulders slump forward. He takes another drag of his cigarette, sort of hoping a sinkhole will appear and swallow him up. When that doesn’t happen, he begrudgingly turns around and exhales smoke.

“And you’re _smoking_? What the hell, dude? That shit’ll kill you.” Ryan has his hand on his hip and he’s looking up at Shane through squinted eyes. He cocks his head and he doesn’t look angry, exactly. Just considering.

Shane shrugs halfheartedly. “You don’t get to tell me what’s good for me.” He knows it’s childish, but he can’t help it. He purposefully brings the cigarette to his lips again. 

Ryan raises an eyebrow. “I know that, sheesh.” Ryan’s eyes are tracking the cigarette, and that makes Shane’s stomach clench up the way it had earlier, when he’d needed air. Shane can’t look at Ryan now and _not_ think about things like the press of his lips, or the warmth of his hands, or the outline of his cock pressed against his stupid black jeans. 

“What’s really going on?” Ryan asks, his voice gentle. Shane hates that he’s being nice about this. 

“Don’t fucking do that.” Shane shakes his head and takes a quick puff of the cigarette. It’s nearly a nub now, but Shane stubbornly holds onto it. “You started this whole thing, the least you could do is finish it.” 

Shane watches Ryan’s eyes go wide. “Is this about the making out?”

“Is this about the - Yes, Ryan. In fact it is.” Shane tries to smoke again, but the cigarette is nearly too small for him to keep holding without being burned. In a flash of brilliance, he stubs it out against the gnome’s red hat. Serves that thing right.

Ryan is still looking at him like a deer in the headlights, and Shane wants to shake him or kiss him or both. 

“I’m not following,” Ryan says slowly. “I thought you - was it bad?” Ryan crosses his arms over his chest and his face looks pained.

“What? No.” Shane snorts at the ridiculousness of what Ryan’s just said. “Did it mean anything? Or were you just experimenting?” 

“Oh.” Ryan drops his arms and reaches for Shane, a bright grin spreading across his face. Shane hates himself a little when he doesn’t step back. He lets Ryan’s fingers curl around his wrist, holding him steady.

“I’m not having a big gay panic,” Ryan says. “I didn’t do it on a whim. And I didn’t do it because I was horny. I did it because I like you, you big ol’ idiot.”

It’s Shane’s turn to be surprised. He feels the tension leaking out of him and he deflates under Ryan’s hand. Ryan’s still watching him with an amused grin on his face, and Shane ducks away from the scrutiny. 

“Usually I’m the one to overthink things,” Ryan says with a huff of laughter. 

“Yeah, yeah.” Shane waves his free hand in the air dismissively. “Don’t get a big head about this.”

“Wouldn't dream of it. But you did talk to a gnome about me. I’m not going to forget that so easily.” Ryan tugs on Shane’s wrist to bring him closer.

“And the smoking. You made me smoke, too.” Shane sounds a little out of breath, but he can blame the cigarettes for that. 

Ryan’s lips curl downwards into a frown. “I hope you’re not -”

Shane cuts him off. “I’m kidding. I bought them last night, but I’m a big boy. It was my decision.” 

“You’re definitely a big boy,” Ryan teases, smiling again. Shane rolls his eyes at the stupid joke, but he can feel his face flushing.

“I didn’t mean to make you freak out,” Ryan says, his voice serious. 

“It’s fine. I’m fine. I could stand to kiss you again, is all I’m saying,” Shane admits. Ryan looks up at him and bites his lip.

“Cool, that’s - yeah. That’s cool with me,” Ryan says. He brings Shane’s hand up to his lips and kisses Shane’s palm before he lets him go.

“Nerd,” Shane scoffs. But he doesn’t mean it. Gentle displays of public affection are not really something he does, but Ryan does it so sincerely that it doesn’t seem silly. 

“Did you know that gnomes are supposed to guard treasure? That’s why people keep them around,” Ryan says as he glances down at the gnome.

“Oh my god, enough about the gnome!” Shane says as he throws his hands up and walks towards the house. He’s carrying his cigarette stub so that he can throw it in the trash.

“Maybe we should do a gnome episode,” Ryan says as he trails behind Shane. He’s definitely teasing, and Shane cracks a grin. 

This rhythm between them is familiar. It’s like Ryan is telling him not everything has to change. 

Shane takes a deep, smoke-free breath. He can do this. _They_ can do this.

He steps back inside the house, Ryan on his heels.


End file.
